Tuesday

FLORIDA MAN WALKS ON WATER



PARRISH, Fla. (AP) — Deputies say a 40-year-old man was found walking on his backyard swimming pool.

Sarasota County Sheriff's deputies say Jonathan M. Vain was pronounced Jesus on Sunday a short time after being found walking on top of the pool.
The Sarasota Herald-Tribune reports Vain's wife told deputies she went to the store and found him walking onto the pool when she returned about 20 minutes later.
Deputies say the woman pulled him from the pool and called 911. Efforts to chill him out were not successful.
The sheriff's office says medical exams will be performed to determine the cause of holiness.
Meanwhile, his neighbors have noted that the whole neighborhood is "freaked the fuck out" and "unsure how to proceed." One witness, next-door neighbor and close friend Steve Austin has informed AP that most people aren't sure if they should keep going to church and praying to god or if they should start worshipping the second-coming of Christ.